At a recent lecture engagement in Florida, I was introduced by a pediatrician who told me that she had two sets of twins. I did not have the chance to talk with her after the session because she had to return to her practice. One of the things I wanted to ask her was whether she had seen an increasing number of multiple births over her fifteen years as a practicing pediatrician. When I got home I found the answer in a detailed report by the National Center for Health Statistics. (Martin 1999). The findings are quite remarkable. The study looked at birth rates from 1980-1997. Over that time period the number of twin births rose 52 percent (from 68,370 to 104,137) while the number of triplets and higher order multiple births climbed an astonishing 404 percent (from 1,337 to 6,737). Multiple birth rates were highest among older women aged 30 and over. The older the mother, the greater the likelihood of her having multiple births. The rate was 63 percent for women aged 40-44 years of age and the rate rose to 1000 percent for women 45 to 49 years of age. Rates between non Hispanic white and black mothers are now roughly comparable.

Accordingly, a great many parents are now facing the challenges of rearing twins and triplets as well as higher order multiple births. Fortunately there are now many books (e.g. Pearlman 2000) and websites (e.g. About.com: Parenting of Multiples and American Baby: Parenting Twins and Multiples) for parents raising twins and higher order multiple birth children.

Most of the experts, and parents of multiples, agree on a few basic requirements. Perhaps the single most important, and agreed upon necessity, is to have family and friends help you particularly during the early months. It is hard enough to meet all of the needs of one baby, much less two or more. It may be hard to do this if you are one of those parents who pride themselves on your independence and ability to meet all your responsibilities on your own. But some circumstances require that we put our pride aside, and multiple births is one of them. The areas in which you will probably need the most help are nighttimes, going to the pediatrician, doing the household chores such as washing clothes and dishes, dressing, feeding and bathing, shopping, and so on. If you can afford to pay someone to come and help in these areas that would make your life a lot easier. If you are not in that position, in most cases, family and friends are more than willing to pitch in.

A second basic responsibility is to appreciate that each baby is different. With twins, for example, even though one may be just a few minutes older than the other, it has been found that the older twin tends to be the most dominant. Getting to know each child’s temperament and personality helps you better to bond with each one and to treat him or her with the individuality each one needs and deserves. There are many more good ideas for parents of multiples in the sources mentioned above. The main thing to remember is that multiple birth children are a real challenge but also a very real joy.

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Martin, J. A. P., M. (1999). Trends in Twin and Triplet Births: 1980-97, National Center for Health Statistics.

Pearlman, E. M. G., J.A. (2000). Raising Twins: What Parents Want to Know (And What Twins Want to Them). New York, Harper Resource.